It’s the ultimate healer – for others, the ultimate scourge. It’s the essential component of everyday life, and the seemingly mystical otherworld we enter into at night. It’s our entrance into the world as we know it and our departure. We can never seem to get enough of it, and it threatens to make or break us as our management of the 24-hour system becomes ever more hectic. As an avid night owl, I hate sleep – and yet I covet it. And I also know that it’s the axe which looms over the finely woven cord which ties a relationship together – the cord which emphasizes love, trust, and thoughtfulness, but can be severed in an instant simply because of SLEEP.
The end of a marriage can be devastating for everyone involved, regardless of the circumstances by which it occurs. Sometimes, if both partners are wiling, it’s possible to work through your marital problems, but unfortunately this isn’t always a viable option. Getting divorced will play havoc with your emotions, but it’s important to try and keep a clear head to deal effectively with the financial issues involved so that you can resolve your family matters with as little distress as possible.
Your Provincial Laws
When you first start thinking about your finances, the most important thing to understand is the laws in your province that pertain to asset distribution. If your property is considered jointly owned or personally owned according to whether or not it was acquired through the efforts of one or both partners, it is important to remember that this doesn’t automatically mean that any and all property you acquired while married counts as jointly owned.
Bank Accounts, Assets, and Investments
The simplest way to divide cash and assets, if both partners are agreeable, is to split everything you currently have down the middle, or agree to split assets based on what assets and debts each party brought into the marriage, and contributed during it. Either option can work when both partners are employed, and there are no children involved.
If, however, you have children, it’s likely that you or your partner has been out of the workforce—and therefore neither of these options might be viable. When one parent has worked outside the home building a career that will continue to generate income, and the other has spent that time doing unpaid work in the home, asset division is more complicated. Generally, the parent who was out of the workforce won’t be able to re-enter it at a comparable income level to the parent who continued to work. In some instances, the courts typically direct the non-custodial parent to make financial contributions, such as mortgage payments, if the custodial parent’s income is significantly lower. In all other situations, the principles of equitable distribution apply.
The House and Mortgage
Splitting up possessions and any cash you have in bank accounts is relatively simple—the mortgage is not quite so easy. If you and your partner have a mortgage, you typically have three options: both parties move out and the house is sold, one person remains in the home and buys out the other party, or you both retain ownership and split the mortgage payments. The first option is the cleanest: the mortgage is paid off, and both parties make a fresh start in a new house. Sometimes, however, it’s not financially viable to sell right away: if the housing market took a downturn since you bought the property, you might end up owing money on the mortgage.
Often the second option is preferred if there are children in the marriage, with the custodial parent remaining in the home and buying out the other parent. If one partner will retain ownership of the house, the mortgage should be refinanced According to money.co.uk , “when two people take out a joint mortgage both are agreeing to be equally liable for the debt for the duration of the mortgage, not just while you live there”. This is also true in the US and Canada: if both your names are on the mortgage, you’re both responsible for ensuring it continues to get paid, and both liable if there are any future payment problems. Therefore, if you agree that one partner will retain ownership, the mortgage and title deed should reflect this as soon as possible—preferably with most of the details sorted out before the divorce is final. Refinancing isn’t always possible, of course—for this option to work, the partner who’s retaining the house must have the income and credit rating needed for mortgage approval.
If the mortgage is almost fully paid, or if selling the house isn’t financially viable, you may decide to retain the house and split the mortgage payments. For the same reasons as outlined for the second option, it’s a good idea to get the agreement in writing, even if you’re still on pretty good terms with your ex. If he or she defaults on their share of payments, it’ll end up reflecting on your credit score, too.
What about Debt?
Mortgage aside, it’s generally a bad idea to continue holding jointly-owned debt after a divorce. The best option is to cancel all joint credit cards as soon as possible: neither party should have the ability to generate more jointly-owned debt, particularly if the divorce becomes acrimonious. While it’s preferable to pay off all debt in full, this isn’t always possible. In this case, once the amount of debt each person is responsible for has been agreed on, each balance should be transferred to a new personal credit card
This dispute by two sisters over a cello is a good example why it is important to address wills and estates. Read more at Dinning Hunter’s Victoria Law Blog.
If you have ever tried to figure out with your adult siblings how to provide for the needs of an ageing parent, you’ll know that the family dynamics can suddenly change, and not always for the better. Of course, the death of a parent will also fundamentally affect the sibling dynamic.
It’s not unusual for parents to resort to using negative consequences to curb bad behavior, however relying on these tactics will not produce the same results as if you were using positive reinforcements. Instead of merely scolding your child when he’s being bad, take the time to praise him when he’s being good. This will take work on your part, because you will need to train yourself to pay attention to the positive behavior instead of the negative. These 18 blogs share ideas on how to use positive reinforcement with your kids.
Positive Reinforcement Techniques
Start out by becoming a student of your child. Study him and see what things make him happy and what things upset him. Make note of which of his behaviors you would like to change, such as hitting or screaming. Praise him for his positive behavior, and ignore him when he is screaming (as long as he’s safe). Children want your attention, and if the only way they can get it is by doing positive things, that is what they’ll resort to. You can find out more about positive reinforcement techniques in these six blogs.
Every August, millions of kids trudge to the bus stop in the early morning hours, dragging backpacks and lunch boxes and saying goodbye to summer vacation. Parents know that in a month or two, these same kids will settle into a routine and may even look forward to school, but in the meantime, what can parents do to beat the back-to-school blues?
In Psychology Today, Dr. Michael Unger argues that students don’t enjoy attending school unless they feel engaged in learning. The American Psychological Association also lists changing schools, taking tough classes and fearing unknown academic or social situations as reasons for children’s anxieties.
Moms are busy from sun up to sun down. From the time you wake up, you’re usually crossing one thing or another off your to-do list, waking up the kids and getting them fed and off to school. It doesn’t stop there, though. Once the kids are gone you have limited time to accomplish the things you need to, whether it’s work, errands or both. After school typically means helping with homework and shuttling the kids to after school activities, not to mention getting dinner on the table. Before you know it, it’s bath time and bed time for the kids, and your entire day has passed in the blink of an eye. This hectic schedule rarely leaves time for one of the most important things you can do during your day: recharging your own batteries. With the help of these 15 blogs, though, even a busy mom should be able to find a little time to relax.
Hiring the right nanny for your family means doing your homework. It means checking references, comparing work histories and conducting multiple interviews. But getting to the heart of the matter means asking the kinds of tough questions that force someone applying for a nanny job to give honest, thorough, revealing answers. It’s not about embarrassing them or causing them to trip up; this isn’t an interrogation on prime-time TV. Rather, it’s about getting them to think outside the box and talk honestly about their successes and failures. Once you have that information, you can then use that knowledge to start building trust and determine whether a particular nanny is the best fit for your family. Here are some questions to guide you:
Participation in group sports has a wide range of benefits for kids, from teaching them valuable teamwork skills to encouraging physical fitness and active play. However, organized sports can also bring out the worst in kids if they’re not taught the importance of good sportsmanship and why they should always work to be good sports. Fostering a sense of good sportsmanship starts at home, and isn’t the sole responsibility of coaches. These tips can help you create an environment in which sportsmanship reigns supreme and avoid potential problems with kids’ behavior later.
Just how far can you take freedom of speech in today’s world? It seems a bit unfair that a simple comment can warrant jail time. Unfortunately, that is the world that has been shaped since September 11, 2001. Terrorist comments can be seen as threats, regardless of the context of the comment, and scrutinize an individual whether he or she has a previous criminal record or not. If teenagers such as Justin Carter can be arrested because of an inappropriate joke, then how far will law enforcement go in order to deem one a terrorist?
Trying to deal with the house, work, the kids and your family can leave you exhausted, and understandably so. Fitting in time for exercise? Now that can seem next to impossible. However, if you think you have no time in your day to fit in some fitness, think again. From exercising with your baby to incorporating a short but effective workout into your day, these 30 bloggers have tips for even the busiest of moms, making it possible to fit a few minutes of exercise into each day.
When you spend your days running around trying to get everything done it can be difficult to locate any time for yourself. These total body workout tips are quick ways for you to squeeze exercising into your already busy schedule. Regular exercise can help you lose weight, build muscle tone and increase your energy, making it important to find ways to add it into your day. These five blog entries explain how to fit a little exercise into your day.
- 7 Total Body Exercises for Busy Moms
- 10 Fitness Tips for Busy Moms
- Busy Mom’s Make-it-Happen Fitness Tips
- Busy Moms: Give Your Exercise Program a KISS
- My Best Fitness Tips for Busy Moms